I've seen "wife" used very rarely lately, too. In the last 10 or so Thai BL dramas I watched I've only seen it used in one drama, and even then only once. And I can't remember if you've watched Bad Buddy, but they had this great scene that reads like the direct confrontation with that trope. I think I'll have the link to the gifset of that scene in my bookmarks, because I really loved it - here it is, if you'd like to take a look.
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